1. Have a girlfriend... :P
2. Start fishing in ur neighbours (!!!)water tank. Its as simple as this: Put a few fishes into the tank. Fish them out, again put bak into the tank....if ne fish dies in the process put another one in. Keep doing this till you have suff. no of dead fishes for your dinner( this idea wuz suggested by mufeed, guess hes catching on sme weirdnes...)
3. Memorize the directory. Read the prev. post for explanations.
4. Think of 'World Peace'
5. Jump into a well....n just in cse u don't noe how to swim, learn swimming b4 jumping...
6. Head banging to Himesh's songs....or rather banging your head against wall... :)
7. Play 'Roadrash' on a c2d 3 gb ram Geforce GTX 200 comp...
8. Shut up n sleep.....y bother the world arnd u...
9. Calculate the value of gravity by jumping from the 10th floor of a building....( in case u want a more precise answer jump from the 20th floor) ..just in case u forgot the formulae: ht= .5*g*t^2
10. Write a blog...!!!
Thursday, June 19, 2008
Weirdos guide to the Galaxy : the non-hitchhiking approach
Finite I'm-probability Drive : The baap of Infinite Improbability Drive
The Hitckhikers approach:
he Infinite Improbability Drive is a fictional faster-than-light drive in The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy series of books. The most prominent usage of the drive is in the starship Heart of Gold. It is based on a particular perception of quantum theory: a subatomic particle is most likely to be in a particular place, such as near the nucleus of an atom, but there is also a small probability of it being found very far from its point of origin (for example close to a distant star). Thus, a body could travel from place to place without passing through the intervening space (or hyperspace, for that matter), if you had sufficient control of probability. As the Improbability Drive reaches infinite improbability, it passes through every conceivable point in every conceivable universe almost simultaneously. In other words, you're never sure where you'll end
up or even what species you'll be when you get there. It's therefore important to dress accordingly.
Weirdos Approach:
Since there is a probabilty that an Infinite Improbabilty Drive exists there is an equal probabilty that it doesnt. The improbabilty of an Infinite Improbabilty Drive paves way for the existance of an Infinite Probability Drive and a Finite Improbability Drive. Due to a possible scarcity of infinite probabilty on universe (this scarcity is however finitely probable....) the Infinite Probability Drive is ruled out. Speaking of the Finite Improbability Drive - Its infinite times safer and more probable than the Infinite Improbabilty drive.It is also based on a particular perception of quantum theory: a subatomic particle is most likely to be in a particular place, such as near the nucleus of an atom, but there is also a small probability of it being found at a point finitely close to the point of origin ( which can either be the neighbouring planet or well ur favourite restuarant....)Thus, a body could travel from place to place without passing through the intervening space.You might need infinite need infinite sub-atomic particles for the same though....further this drive is accelarated by language weirdness gradient...hence if it is assumed that earthly languages are far less weird than alien languages you can acheive massive accelaration levels.
Now this has got certain obvious advantages ovr the infinite improbability drive which are listed below:
1. Wow its probable that u mite land up in your fav. restaurant...!!!
2. Its mre probable with this that you reach your destination and it saves time as well based on your luck probability factor. Also you mite very well give up the idea of going to the desired destination thereby saving evn more time.
3. Its far less embarrassing. I mean you mite very well be dressed up as an Eskimo while landing onto a desert in case of inf. improbability drive.
4. You feel lesser 'alien'ated....
5. It gives you sufficient time and opportunity to learn alien languages
6. Since it travels at speed lesser than the speed of light you can well escape getting dwarfed or shortened to un-imaginary levels.
7. weirdos are far more professional than the hitchhikers so trust 'the professional' ones.
42
The Hitchhikers guide say:
The Answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything has a numeric solution in Douglas Adams' series The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy is 42. In the story, a "simple answer" to The Ultimate Question is requested from the computer Deep Thought, specially built for this purpose. It takes Deep Thought 7½ million years to compute and check the answer, which turns out to be 42. Unfortunately, The Ultimate Question itself is unknown, suggesting on an allegorical level that it is more important to ask the right questions than to seek definite answers.
and the Weirdos say:
The answer should be 61.
Reasons:
1. My roll no is 61.
2. Since the answer to such a question cannot be sweet , 61, the reciprocal of the 'sweet 16' figure seems the most appropriate
3. 61 is prime, and since this question is of 'prime'ary importance 61 fits in well.
4. 61 is as arbit as 42!!!!
ps- Even though weirdos hate hitchhiking it is highly recommended that you spend your time memorizing the directory so that you have greater chances of survival when thrown into empty space.
The Hitckhikers approach:
he Infinite Improbability Drive is a fictional faster-than-light drive in The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy series of books. The most prominent usage of the drive is in the starship Heart of Gold. It is based on a particular perception of quantum theory: a subatomic particle is most likely to be in a particular place, such as near the nucleus of an atom, but there is also a small probability of it being found very far from its point of origin (for example close to a distant star). Thus, a body could travel from place to place without passing through the intervening space (or hyperspace, for that matter), if you had sufficient control of probability. As the Improbability Drive reaches infinite improbability, it passes through every conceivable point in every conceivable universe almost simultaneously. In other words, you're never sure where you'll end
up or even what species you'll be when you get there. It's therefore important to dress accordingly.
Weirdos Approach:
Since there is a probabilty that an Infinite Improbabilty Drive exists there is an equal probabilty that it doesnt. The improbabilty of an Infinite Improbabilty Drive paves way for the existance of an Infinite Probability Drive and a Finite Improbability Drive. Due to a possible scarcity of infinite probabilty on universe (this scarcity is however finitely probable....) the Infinite Probability Drive is ruled out. Speaking of the Finite Improbability Drive - Its infinite times safer and more probable than the Infinite Improbabilty drive.It is also based on a particular perception of quantum theory: a subatomic particle is most likely to be in a particular place, such as near the nucleus of an atom, but there is also a small probability of it being found at a point finitely close to the point of origin ( which can either be the neighbouring planet or well ur favourite restuarant....)Thus, a body could travel from place to place without passing through the intervening space.You might need infinite need infinite sub-atomic particles for the same though....further this drive is accelarated by language weirdness gradient...hence if it is assumed that earthly languages are far less weird than alien languages you can acheive massive accelaration levels.
Now this has got certain obvious advantages ovr the infinite improbability drive which are listed below:
1. Wow its probable that u mite land up in your fav. restaurant...!!!
2. Its mre probable with this that you reach your destination and it saves time as well based on your luck probability factor. Also you mite very well give up the idea of going to the desired destination thereby saving evn more time.
3. Its far less embarrassing. I mean you mite very well be dressed up as an Eskimo while landing onto a desert in case of inf. improbability drive.
4. You feel lesser 'alien'ated....
5. It gives you sufficient time and opportunity to learn alien languages
6. Since it travels at speed lesser than the speed of light you can well escape getting dwarfed or shortened to un-imaginary levels.
7. weirdos are far more professional than the hitchhikers so trust 'the professional' ones.
42
The Hitchhikers guide say:
The Answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything has a numeric solution in Douglas Adams' series The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy is 42. In the story, a "simple answer" to The Ultimate Question is requested from the computer Deep Thought, specially built for this purpose. It takes Deep Thought 7½ million years to compute and check the answer, which turns out to be 42. Unfortunately, The Ultimate Question itself is unknown, suggesting on an allegorical level that it is more important to ask the right questions than to seek definite answers.
and the Weirdos say:
The answer should be 61.
Reasons:
1. My roll no is 61.
2. Since the answer to such a question cannot be sweet , 61, the reciprocal of the 'sweet 16' figure seems the most appropriate
3. 61 is prime, and since this question is of 'prime'ary importance 61 fits in well.
4. 61 is as arbit as 42!!!!
ps- Even though weirdos hate hitchhiking it is highly recommended that you spend your time memorizing the directory so that you have greater chances of survival when thrown into empty space.
Thursday, June 12, 2008
Ode on the death of a cockroch in the mess food.....
Thy came, Thy saw , Thy thought
What was inside that earthen pot
Thy trod upon it with pace
To give it a nice little gaze
Was it coloured water or was it dal u wondered
Without givin an afterthought you blundered
One big leap into the pool
Oh heavens! it wasnt that cool
Obnoxious , mirky , filthy or nauseating
I dunno wut the poor cockroach was feeling
I just wished the cockroach had one more life
So that it understood on what filth we thrive
Oh Almighty I prayer to thee
Brighten its future to be...
I ardently wish that in your nxt life
U get pizzas, paranthas, whisky n slice
I know how badly you fell from grace
To die in the mess food is such a sad disgrace
I just wish i had tasted u once
u must hve been tastier than the mess food by tonnes..................
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~RIP~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What was inside that earthen pot
Thy trod upon it with pace
To give it a nice little gaze
Was it coloured water or was it dal u wondered
Without givin an afterthought you blundered
One big leap into the pool
Oh heavens! it wasnt that cool
Obnoxious , mirky , filthy or nauseating
I dunno wut the poor cockroach was feeling
I just wished the cockroach had one more life
So that it understood on what filth we thrive
Oh Almighty I prayer to thee
Brighten its future to be...
I ardently wish that in your nxt life
U get pizzas, paranthas, whisky n slice
I know how badly you fell from grace
To die in the mess food is such a sad disgrace
I just wish i had tasted u once
u must hve been tastier than the mess food by tonnes..................
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~RIP~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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